80's Teen Movies :: the classic, the obscure & everything in between: contest

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Pick-Up Summer AKA Pinball Summer [1980]

"School's out and everything's in!"

Pick-Up Summer, or the more aptly titled Pinball Summer, is a slapstick Canadian teen comedy that begins on the last day of school and ends, presumably, towards the end of summer at the big(?) local pinball tournament. The plot, or lack of one, centers around the teenagers who populate the rowdy-but-cool O.J.'s Fast Food Restaurant and Pete's, an amusement arcade complete with its very own mascot cheerleaders. The arcade, being the spot where all the kids hang out, is home to endless brawls (and as much as we'd hoped to see Principal Vernon walk through the door and ask what's that ruckus, it wasn't to be) and a helluva lot of commotion, resulting in complaints from the uptight residents of the town. But if all the Pete's protesters reckon their complaining'll do anything to straighten out the loudmouthed teens, they've got another think comin'.

First on the agenda for main characters Greg and Steve and their girlfriends Donna and Suzy is to terrorize the dorky neighbourhood rich boy, but not before being harassed by the leather-clad, motorbike riding hard nut of the town, Bert. But when the pinball championship trophy is stolen, the kids are less worried about picking fights, quick fumbles and days at the amusement park than they are of finding the trophy for themselves. And when it falls into the hands of Bert and the biker gang, Greg and Steve hatch a plan to steal it back, hiding it in a place where no one would think to look. Well, no one except overweight, under-brained and butt-of-all-jokes Pete's employee named Whimpy, who later discovers the trophy hidden inside a pinball machine.

Striking up a deal with Bert who is eager to relocate the trophy he so cunningly hijacked in the first place, Whimpy tucks his new find away and heads off to discuss business. Bert agrees to get Whimpy laid in exchange, but meanwhile, Pete, the uh.. owner of.. well, Pete's, strikes gold and accidentally discovers the senseless Whimpy's hiding place.

Greg, Steve, Donna and Suzy go for a cosy camp-out on the beach in the mean time, but are rudely interrupted by Bert's biker gang, who graffiti the side of Steve's van as revenge for their earlier altercation involving the trophy. But revenge works both ways, and Steve and Greg are unlikely to let their number one enemies outsmart them!

As all responsible *ahem* adults do in teen movies, Donna and Suzy's parents (oh, did I forget to mention? Greg and Steve's girlfriends are sisters) go away and leave their daughters in charge of the house for a while, which means only one thing. OUTRAGEOUS POOL PARTY TIME! The place is even complete with an arcade-sized pinball machine, which is used for an oh-so mature game of 'strip pinball' involving busty O.J.'s waitress Sally. It ain't called strip pinball for nothing! And it all seems like a genius idea, but the parents - who swiftly ground their daughters and their barely-clothed butts for a week - beg to differ. They still manage to sneak out to a disco in the middle of the night, though, and meet some guy dressed as John Travolta who offers them a ride in his jerk-mobile. And so begins the fifteen minute win the girl, lose the girl, win the girl routine, where Greg and Steve express their jealousy over the white-suited, black-booted, boogie-woogie asshole and his magic ability of picking up chicks - their chicks - after waving his arms like an epileptic goldfish (..with arms).

Now all that kerfuffle is done with and there are a few minutes left to spare, it's time for the actual pinball contest. The best players in town competing for the title of Pinball King. Greg VS Bert. Shall we guess how it ends? Not including the shot of waitress Sally trundling down the road on top of a speeding pinball machine, I mean.

VERDICT: ★★ ½

Oozing with total '70sness, Pinball Summer is a flick that ticks all the low budget teen sex comedy expectations boxes. But it doesn't exactly portray pinball as the most riveting of competitive sports. And if you've ever been beaten on by a badass biker, i'm sure you'll have a good belly laugh at the character of Bert, who is possibly the tamest, most non-threatening 'bully' to ever make it into a movie. Not to mention the fact he straps the pinball trophy to the front of his Honda in some kind of desperate attempt at displaying his manliness. Also, Carl Marotte and Michael Zelniker spend about half of their screen time making eyes at one another, or so it seems.

Believe you me, Pinball Summer does have a clever way of ingraining itself in your mind, (no, i'm not talking about the boobage) and for one scene and one scene only. Without spoiling it, all I will say is that it involves a drive-in movie and a very cleverly rigged-up voice over. Beyond that, the movie relies heavily on tiresome gags and gravity-defying stunts. But we can forgive it this time, can't we?

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

Someone with a lot more wisdom than myself has given me a shout to say that an OST for Pinball Summer was, actually, released on vinyl! But by the sounds of it, the chances of coming across a copy are few and far between.

1. Hot Wax - Denis Lepage
2. Gimme Your Love - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
3. Evil Woman - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
4. Do You Wanna Dance? - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
5. Pinball Summer - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
6. Wheel of Fortune - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
7. Summer Girls - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
8. Sally Joy - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
9. Can You Catch Me - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
10. Summer Magic - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
11. Voyeur's Motel - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier
12. Sweet Madness - Jay Boivin & Germain Gauthier

Fast Forward [1985]

"When you've got one shot at the top you've got to move"

The Adventurous Eight - a group of (how many? Err, eight!) teenagers from a small town in Ohio who crave stardom so badly that they spend their spare time rehearsing their home made songs and dance routines in a locked up old building after knocking off from school each day. But in the smallest towns lie the biggest of dreams, and these eight kids have all the determination and drive they need to take them all the way to the top. But getting there is the hard part.

A reluctant promise of an audition from a bigshot dance exec leads the kids to the Big - and mean - Apple, but on arrival at the company headquarters they are greeted by some unexpected and unfortunate news. The very guy who had promised them an audition had not only left the dance business, but died! Having travelled all the way to New York City, the Adventurous Eight refuse to be rejected, and the two (and only) male members of the group - Matt and Michael - take the situation into their own hands and try a bit of pleading. Begging the new company owner to give them a shot, he eventually gives in, telling them to audition in two weeks time. Bad news! None of the teens had banked on staying for that long, neither did they have enough cash in their pockets to. But giving in so easily isn't an option..

The kids come to the decision that the only way of making it is to stay and show the world what they're made of. So they rent a rather squalid apartment, spruce it up, and assemble a plan to raise enough money to live on until the day of the big audition. Step one: crashing a swank restaurant to showcase their moves. Miraculously, their routine leads to a standing ovation from the wealthy diners, who proceed to throw their money at the talented gang.

Over the next couple of weeks, the Adventurous Eight continue to raise money by any means possible: passing out business cards; dancing in front of crowds on the streets; you name it. But all work and no play isn't a phrase in the teenagers' dictionary and with the chance to hit the clubs and check out a famous dance hotspot, they can't resist. What they don't realize is that word has gotten out of their talents and a local badass dance crew ain't too happy about their presence. Time for a dance battle, baby! Only, this is one battle the small town country kids are destined to lose.

On a downer after being upstaged by the fresh dancers at 'The Zoo', and well aware that their audition day will soon be arriving, the Adventurous Eight vow to step up their act. And what that calls for is practice, practice, practice. Will they be able to get their own back and not die from embarrassment this time around?

Impressing the club-goers isn't their number one priority, and next in line is their shot at the big time with Sabel Industries. Turning up for their anxiously awaited audition, the kids face another huge knock-back when they are rejected once again, and in spite of the verbal contract between them and the company owner, it turns out to be yet another false promise. Furious that they have been deceived, a persistent Matt and Michael conspire one final plot which is to be their last lifeline on the road to fame. Will they make it to the huge Sabel talent contest? And will all their blood, sweat and tears pay off in the end?

VERDICT: ★★★ ½

Woah! What's this movie called again? Loose Footed Teenagers in Spandex Just Want to Have Fun While Pursuing Fame and Dancing Flashly But Not So Dirtily 2: Electric Boogaloo? Oh no. I got a little confused there.

We all know that the wondrous '80s pumped out a multitude of dance movies. I mean, there are just so many of the damn things that they are in a universe of their own. Fast Forward is one that is very rarely mentioned, even among geeks of the genre. Although it is nothing you haven't seen before, it's a shamelessly enjoyable romp about wearing leg warmers and making your dreams come true. It has the obligatory dance battle, the fixing up of a run-down building, the whole "we can make it no matter what" attitude. You just can't match flicks like these (not these days, anyway). Inevitably, you've gotta cringe through some corny bits of acting, but on a whole that side of things is a lot more bearable than you'd expect.

A harmless bit of fun, complete with a generous amount of staple '80s fashions and fads, a plot that can never be taken too seriously, and a guy dressed as Boy George.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie clip]

SOUNDTRACK:

Only one complaint to make about the soundtrack. In fact, the soundtrack isn't at fault here - the movie only features a few seconds of Siedah Garrett's Do You Want It Right Now. Hands down, the best track in the entire movie. Breakin' Out isn't too far behind in terms of awesomeness, though.

1. Breakin' Out - Deco
2. Do You Want It Right Now - Siedah Garrett
3. Long as We Believe - Siedah Garrett & David Swanson
4. Curves - Deco
5. Taste - Deco
6. Showdown - Pulse
7. Survive - Deco
8. Fast Forward - Deco

Jocks [1987]

"Champions aren't born ... they're made!"

Coach Bettlebom is an unmotivated college phys ed teacher who - in over ten years - hasn't once managed to win a sports trophy. His kids don't fare much better, and most of them aren't achieving much in terms of grades - to say the least. So when President White (Christopher Lee - yeah, THE Christopher Lee) decides to better the reputation of the college, he gives Bettlebom an ultimatum: construct a team of winners or else.

Tennis coach Chip Williams (Richard Roundtree) is the next in line for a lecture, this time from Bettlebom, who threatens to scrap the tennis program despite the team being the best the college has to offer. Defending the 'pansy' sport, Williams proposes that the team are ready for the big upcoming tennis tournament, and that if they lose, Bettlebom is entitled to rid the college of the sport.

Enter 'The Kid' (Scott Strader), college 'degenerate' and big time party animal. Along with the rest of the tennis team - the uptight Jeff (Perry Lang), insane Ripper (Donald Gibb - playing almost exactly the same character as he did in Revenge of the Nerds), campy Prince-like dude Andy, the women-obsessed Tex (Adam Mills), and crazy Mexican Chito (Trinidad Silver), they're shipped off to Las Vegas to compete in the contest.

As you can imagine, most of the team are more interested in gambling, getting laid, and all-round partying rather than the competition. However, none of them are aware how high the stakes really are and Williams and Bettlebom do a good job in keeping their agreement under wraps.

First up, a night of drinking is in order and, ignoring William's strict orders to keep on top form for the match, they drive off to a nearby club. It isn't long before they're approached by all-too-friendly team members from a rival college, whose intentions aren't as good as first assumed - setting the Kid and his teammates up. By the time the next day rolls around, the guys are completely hungover and in no state for the first round match.

Having obviously not learned from their mistakes and not too bothered about the contest, the Kid and the guys go off for another night of partying and by now, Williams is at wits end. At this point, the Kid has fallen for Nicole (Mariska Hargitay) - a girl who just happens to be from the rival college. Whilst the two share a motel room, the rest of the guys are out getting pretty drunk. All seems peachy until Bettlebom shows his face and goes hunting for the team to tell them that their partying has gotten them disqualified from the contest.

Williams and the guys are determined not to let Bettlebom get rid of the tennis program. A few hookers later, Bettlebom has been stitched up and some uncomplimentary photographic evidence allows the team to take part in the critical competition after all.

But that isn't the end to the scams, when the jealous rival competitors place a bet in the Kid's name, telling him that if his team loses, thousands of dollars will be coming his way. Will the Kid crumble under pressure?

VERDICT: ★ ½

Jocks, good for maybe a laugh or two - mainly at the badly handled tennis scenes - is nothing worth going out of your way to find. Contradicting that statement, it is worth seeing if only for the weird and wonderful cast.

All in all, a not quite mind numbing attempt from Crown International Pictures at a partially serious teen sports movie, full of madly misplaced faces (Christopher Lee -seriously!) and a humdrum seen-it-all-before storyline.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie clip]

SOUNDTRACK:

1. Foxy Lady - John Finley
2. Dirty With You - John Finley
3. Tonight - Pamela Neal
4. Got Some Lovin' For You - Pamela Neal
5. Road Trip - Phillip Kennard, Tim Bryson & Bob Irving
6. Misbehavin' - Phillip Kennard with The Pups
7. How Many Times - Linda Peaches Green
8. Power Play - Jimmy Osmond
9. Body Bruiser - Stephen Tavani
10. Gettin' Hot in Here - Linda Peaches Green
11. Sugar & Spice - Linda Peaches Green
12. Willie Willie - David Backstrom
13. In Trouble Again - David Backstrom & Terry Wilson

Girls Just Want to Have Fun [1985]

"That's all they really want!"

Teenager Janey (Sarah Jessica Parker) has a love for one thing and one thing only: dancing. With her sights set on becoming a star, her luck is in when her family relocate to Chicago - home to none other than the after school dance phenomenon DTV.

Within no time at all, Janey - all too familiar with moving from one school to another - meets the outrageous Dance TV fanatic Lynne (Helen Hunt), and together they plan to showcase their talents in the upcoming DTV auditions. This is it. Now or never. Janey's big break. Well, it would be if it wasn't for her uptight, military obsessed father who is dead against the idea.

Friday arrives. It's the day of the auditions. Lynne is buzzing with excitement, that is, until Janey coughs up the courage to admit she won't be auditioning. But - in a change of heart - her enormous passion for dancing shines through and, ignoring the words of her dad, hops onto the bus downtown.

They arrive, nearly being run down by the spoilt daddy's girl Natalie in the process. Lynne shows a bit of attitude and puts Natalie's nose right out of joint, only leading to disaster later on when - during Lynne's audition - she is shoved around by her dance partner and made to look a fool of in front of the judges, who immediately disqualify her. Lyn and Janey smell a rat and their suspicions are confirmed when they spot the conniving Natalie, who - having schemed up the entire catastrophic audition - is busy paying off Lynne's dance partner for his crafty endeavor. And so begins a continuous battle between the three dance hopefuls!

Having made it through the first round, Janey is paired up with the motorbike riding rebel, Jeff (Lee Montgomery) - who couldn't be more different from the happy-go-lucky Catholic schoolgirl. Clashing nonstop throughout their first rehearsal, things are looking pretty hopeless. But, unsurprisingly, it doesn't take long for the two opposites to attract.

Soon, news has circulated of a party - to be precise, the bratty Natalie's debutantes ball. What better way for Janey and Lynne spread a bit of revenge than by crashing the party! Printing out hundreds of copies of invitations, they invite some of the wackiest, punkiest, scariest looking kids in town, and watch from a distance as the sophisticated gathering is trashed from top to bottom!

Janey and Jeff have become the perfect couple by now, dancing their way to the live DTV final. Things don't come easy though, of course, when Jeff is threatened by Natalie's millionaire father: lose the competition or have your father lose his job. To make things worse, Janey is caught sneaking home from her and Jeff's dance practice late at night and is grounded by her furious father. But will they give in at the last hurdle, or will they make it to DTV? And more importantly - will they win?

VERDICT: ★★★ ½

Girls Just Want to Have Fun is one of the more recognisable New World Pictures flicks - maybe because of the famous faces; Sarah Jessica Parker, Helen Hunt and Shannen Doherty, or simply because it is an enjoyable '80s dance movie. Either way, New World managed to whip up a nice little time capsule of music, dancing and fashions, with a cliched, fluffy, but grin inducing plot. Shannen Doherty with her screechy, squeaky voice in the role of Jeff's little sister is particularly brilliant, as is Helen Hunt's outfits and feathered hair towards the end of the movie.

The words 'classic' and 'definitive' are often used when referring to GJWTHF, though countless other dance movies of the '80s are just as good. However, if you haven't seen it, pop it on one day and go crashing back to '85 as soon as the title rolls up on screen. Without a doubt, worthy of your time.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

The soundtrack was released along with the movie in 1985, on cassette and LP. CD copies were apparently pressed in Germany, too, and are now extremely sought after as a lot of the songs in the movie are difficult to track down. The Deborah Galli/Tami Holbrook/Meredith Marshall cover of 'Girls Just Want to Have Fun' is lacking in energy and doesn't hold a candle to Cyndi Lauper, but isn't bad. Lauper refused to make any appearance in the movie or on the soundtrack as she believed it'd scar her career - though her 1988 movie Vibes is no better than this flick.

1. (Come On) Shout! - Alex Brown
2. On the Loose - Chris Farren
3. I Can Fly - Rainey
4. Dancing In Heaven (Orbital Be-Bop) - Q-Feel
5. Girls Just Want to Have Fun - Deborah Galli feat. Tami Holbrook & Meredith Marshall
6. Dancing In the Street - Animotion
7. Too Cruel - Amy Hart
8. Technique - Rainey
9. Wake Up the Neighborhood - Holland

Yet another scarce but superbly '80s soundtrack that helps make the movie what it is. Should you find it in amongst someones record collection, steal it!

Listen to Me [1989]

"Each of us has the right to be heard."

Tucker Muldowney (Kirk Cameron) is a not-too-well-off kid from the South, who has just been granted one of just two scholarships to join the debate team at Kenmont College. Thrown in for college kitchen duties, he befriends Chicago girl Monica Tomanski (Jami Gertz), who is also a new student. After blasting his mouth off and boasting about his incredible scholarship and the fact he is one of only two kids accepted for the debate-team, he asks Monica what brings her to Kenmont. "Debate", she says. The Southern boy is officially douchetastic after about ten minutes of screen-time.

Introducing himself to his new room-mate, Tucker is ecstatic when it turns out to be popular rich kid and debate team legend Garson McKellar (Tim Quill). They quickly become friends, discussing debate tactics and college life. Monica rooms with Donna (Amanda Peterson), a feisty but vulnerable girl who is unable to walk properly, wearing a leg brace due to an accident during childhood in which she was paralyzed. All four get to know eachother through the debate-team, and come to find themselves as top of the class.

Hanging out together outside of the classroom as well as in, Tucker and Monica begin to get to know one another and it seems as if, although serious debate-team rivals, they are perfect for eachother. Monica is defensive and hardworking, constantly making sure not to drop her guard and allow Tucker to get too close, even when flying off to take part in various debates here there and everywhere. But it's when the pair of them decide to spend Christmas at Garson's flash mansion with his family that things begin to change.

Realising Tucker and Monica are becoming more and more difficult to contend with on the debate team, McKellar contemplates quitting college. His family have high expectations, counting on him continuing the family tradition in law, and when finding out that his ambition is to get into play writing, they laugh the idea off. He feels trapped, and at one point almost drives his sports car over a cliff in hysterics.

The team are then off to take part in the National Debate Tournament versus Harvard. Beforehand, they all decide to go off celebrating, Monica bumping into Garson in a bar. The two have a little too much to drink and end up in his room, where things get heated and Monica freaks out thinking he's trying to attack her. He hits her to quiet her screaming and she flees in tears, running into Tucker on her way out. He chases after her, demanding an explanation to what has happened. Determined to find Garson and give him a piece of his mind, Tucker rushes to the hotel where he finds him back in the bar. McKellar laughs, saying "she actually though I was going to rape her!". His fists clenched, Tucker loses it, laying into his so-called buddy. The fight bursts out onto the street, where a crowd gathers and Tucker is pushed into the road in front of oncoming traffic. Tragically, Garson jumps in front of the vehicle to save his friend, rolling onto the hood of the car and being thrown into the curb, where he breaks his neck and lays there dying.

Both Monica and Tucker can't believe they've lost their friend and head of the debate team under such tragic circumstances and, intent on proving themselves and doing McKellar proud, they put all they've got into the debate tournament. But will they beat Harvard?

VERDICT: ★★ ½

Listen to Me is one of those awkward-to-categorise movies - mostly because, although being based around gang of naive college kids, it is meant to come across as a hard-hitting and serious drama. I don't actually know a great deal about debate teams, but apparently the movie is terribly inaccurate, depicting the whole scene in a completely false light.

The movie is really dated and pretty corny, and I image only of interest to those on college debate teams - although real debate team students would probably laugh at how misleading it is. The main point of interest for me was to watch Amanda Peterson in one of her '80s roles, before she disappeared from the acting scene altogether in the mid-nineties. There are some intellectually stimulating moments, mind you, especially the Kenmont versus Harvard tournament at the end. But all in all it is a pretty bland movie that doesn't offer any laughs or a huge lot of nostalgia (besides a shot of an old 'five grand' hunk of electrical equipment, apparently a 'computer') even for hardcore '80s fans.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

1. Listen to Me - Celine Dion & Warren Wiebe
2. Love Dies in Slow Motion - Judson Spence
3. Dark Light - The Beat Farmers
4. Tough Days Again - Todd Sharp
5. Teach Ya How Ta Rock - Dominick Certo
6. Tutti Frutti - Little Richard
7. Forever Young - Alphaville
8. If We Can't Do It - Cliff Magness
9. Wanderlust - Donna Delorey
10. Who's Gonna Love You Tonight - David Foster
11. Happy Ever After - Julia Fordham

Splitz [1984]

"We wish this movie was about sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll.. but two out of three ain't bad."

Hooter college students Gina (Robin Johnson), Joan and Susie are three feisty rock chicks with high hopes. They've got their own band, the Splitz, but with no manager and no gigs aren't getting far in the music biz. This is where fellow Hooter student Chuck, in the midst of a 2 year scholarship, steps in. With big ambitions of fame and fortune within the music industry, the girls decide he is their best bet. Things start off slow, with Chuck only just managing to scrape together one crummy gig in a bar full of rednecks (which, funnily enough, was filmed in CBGB's).

Meanwhile, conniving Hooter College dean (Shirley Stoler) has been instructed that one sorority house must be demolished to make way for a sewage plant. With the help of the snarky Delta Phi girls, the dean plans an athletics tournament in order to rid the school of the Phi Beta sorority house - a bunch of unpopular misfits who, in the dean's eyes, the school could do without. Settling on three sports contests in all; football, wrestling and basketball, the venomous dean begins her underhand tactics and game one begins.

The football match quickly turns into a joke, with the Delta Phi's making every devious move they can. But when the Splitz girls notice that the Phi Beta's are turning into shark bait, the ballsy Gina joins their team and begins to fight back. After pulling nearly every trick in the book, the Delta Phi's thrash the Beta's, and Gina and the girls are determined to give them a taste of their own medicine.

Gina, Joan and Susie then come up with a scam, in the hopes of getting their own back with a bit of blackmail. Hunting down the dean's harebrained husband, they photograph him in an altogether questionable position, and, showing the dean their embarrassing evidence, she agrees to their demands. Fixing the rules of the next two games, the Delta Phi's are forced to wrestle in their underwear, being upstaged and eventually beaten by the Phi Beta's.

There's one more tournament to go, and, intent on humiliating the Delta's one last time, the game is re-named; strip basketball. With the Beta's raring to go, Gina and Susie wonder where bandmate Joan has disappeared to. The game begins and Joan - the Beta's best player - is still nowhere to be seen. Locked in the changing room next door by the Delta Phi's, and knowing that the team won't last without her, Joan manages to breakout. In the nick of time, the Delta's are annihilated.

Calling Gina, Joan, Susie and Chuck to her office, the dean excludes them all for unfair sportsmanship - even though the entire phony competition was her idea in the first place. With his full scholarship down the drain in an instance, Chuck is desperate. He wants to make himself, and the Splitz, a success. Calling for the help of his sex obsessed cousin Vinnie and gangster inlaws, they set up a gig for the band at the biggest club in town, 'The Palace'. Needless to say, the girl's pull off such an immense gig, that they are signed on the spot for a $20,000 recording deal. But not before they manage to humiliate the dean in front of the entire club!

VERDICT: ★ ½

Splitz, a movie that boasts one of Robin Johnson's larger roles, aint trying to be anything it's not. Lost among the thousands of teen T&A flicks out there, and bearing a grand total of 29 IMDB votes, it, unsurprisingly, is not referred to too fondly. But when you pick up a videotape and the first sentence of the synopsis contains the words 'Hooter College sorority house' and 'sewage treatment plant', I honestly can't give you any sympathy if you pressed play and expected John Hughes. The video case has two errors on it anyway, one of which being a pretty major one - calling Robin Johnson Robin Robinson for starters.

Shirley Stoler is pretty hilarious in her role as the dean, in a senseless, dumb kinda way. The final scene is so bad, it goes past being good, and back round to bad again. But that's okay, 'cause by that point, we don't know whether to laugh, or, in the words of mister band-manager Chuck, find a tree to hang ourselves from.

The good aspect of this movie is that the (nonexistent) soundtrack has a life of it's own. Among the tunes are two Blondie tracks, which always manage to put a smile on your face. The music of the Splitz isn't too bad either - not that the girls make a convincing rock band, but that whoever the underpaid sod was who had to sit and write the songs did a pretty good job. It's also quite sad to watch Robin Johnson in this movie - she could have gotten much further in life than lost sexploitation b-movies.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie clip]

SOUNDTRACK:

None available.