80's Teen Movies :: the classic, the obscure & everything in between: girl friends

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The Allnighter [1987]

"Who says you can't do it all in one night?"

The Allnighter is the story of five college friends on the verge of graduation. Sensitive Molly (Susanna Hoffs), who still hasn't found the one "earth shattering romance" she desires, bubbly blonde Val (DeDee Pfieffer), who is engaged to an over-obnoxious yuppie type, and witty Gina (Joan Cusack), the eager film-maker of the bunch. Then of course we can't forget the surf-obsessed males of the gang: perpetually immature law student C.J. and the quirky, free-spirited Killer.

The movie opens with Gina and her video camera, quizzing her fellow classmates on "what they got" out of their four years at Pacifica College. To which one student, Raymond (Josh Richman, who you may recognise from Thrashin', or as the parking lot heavy metaller from Heathers with the lion/dynamite theory) replies "a couple thousand hangovers and an addiction to pepto-bismol". The initial five minutes of hijinks sets the tone for the night to come - a breezy, brainless adventure.

With the not-so-distant shores of adulthood drifting closer with every passing wave, Molly, Val, Gina, C.J. and Killer are in hot pursuit of the fling to end all flings. The answer? Pulling a no-holds-barred allnighter. To kick-start the celebrations, Molly and Val cook up the gangs' last ever meal together - a task that is easier said than done when Ginas' stash of pot is mistaken for oregano! As the guys hang out at the house they've called home for the past four years, there's an unexpected knock at the door. Enter the man of Mollys' dreams; a sharply dressed older guy with a rock star past who goes by the name of Mickey LeRoy. Could it be fate bringing the two together? Eager Molly seems to think so when he invites himself in and explains to the gang that their very beach house was once home to him and his band, The Rhinos. It soon becomes evident that Molly, an avid Rhinos fan, has the hots for this new character, and all her flirting prompts the rest of the gang into venturing down to the beach for the graduation fiesta. Little does she know that as she dances the night away with her apparent dream man, a deflated C.J. is pining for her attention. Plans for the night are also interrupted by another romantic interlude when wife-to-be Val is beckoned by her loathsome fiancee to spend the night at a hotel. Before long though, her other half hits the sack, leaving her craving some excitement in the form of the fiesta.

Heading off back to his hotel, Mickey LeRoy invites Molly to stop by later on, to her delight. As a result, us viewers are treated to what is the most (and commonly regarded as only) notable few seconds of the film: Ms. Hoffs dancing around the room in her undies to the sound of Aretha Franklins' Respect. Dressed to the nines and ready to knock LeRoy dead, she heads off to his hotel anticipating a steamy night of passion. The truth, as it turns out, couldn't be much further and in an absurd twist of events poor Molly becomes trapped out on Mickeys' balcony while he and his ex-wife get it on inside! Desperate, Molly phones for help from the two people who wont let her down: Gina and Val.

A beach littered with party casualties is all that is left of the fiesta by this point. Val, face down in the sand, is roused by a camera-wielding Gina and, assuming the nights' shenanigans are over they head back to get some sleep. Dishevelled, they arrive home to discover Mollys' urgent message from the hotel and without thinking twice, hop on Ginas' moped to carry out the best friend rescue operation. Further problems arise when the hotel staff suspect the girls as a couple of hookers and have them arrested, leaving Molly - who has only just escaped one sticky situation - in yet another predicament. While Gina and Val are carted off downtown, Molly is left to pick up the pieces of a night left in tatters. With only hours to go before the graduation ceremony, a panic-stricken Molly gathers together as much bail money as she can find and calls on C.J. in distress.

While a confrontation rages between Gina and Val and their psycho cellmate, Molly and C.J. partake in a similar disagreement with a sassy cop named Sergeant Macleish (unexpected cameo by Pam Grier!), whom they must convince of the girls' innocence. The stakes couldn't be higher: fail and miss graduation. But before this allnighter is through, there is one final thing that must be taken care of - Mollys' love life! Ah well, you know what they say - nice gals finish last.

VERDICT: ★★★

Coming across as an innocuous lovechild of Where The Boys Are '84 and Modern Girls, The Allnighter is a buoyant entry into the world of the beach movie with generous helpings of adventure, romance and PG-rated action. The gaudy greatness (which can be associated with, above all, DeDee Pfieffers' wardrobe) and a few dire performances are a lasting reminder of how guilty we should feel for falling for what charm and appeal the movie does have. Come to think of it, maybe the the flaws are the appeal. One element that we can't fault is the likability of the leads who are wonderful as the three graduating girlfriends - principally Joan Cusack who brings heaps of humour to the proceedings. Not to mention the colourful backdrop of Malibu sunshine which makes for the perfect party atmosphere.

Overall, it is a movie about making the most of what you've got and who you've got before you carefree youth is over and maturity comes to bite you in the butt. Making memories, putting friends above all else and not stopping 'til the sun comes up. Even the sudden, rabidly sappy love scene at the end doesn't do enough damage to unravel the feel-good antics of the night, and while it is an inferior movie to Modern Girls, The Allnighter stands as a kitschy, enjoyable girl-power comedy.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

It would be criminal to disregard the soundtrack, which was made available on a now-scarce picture disc vinyl. Timbuk 3's classic The Future's So Bright, I Gotta Wear Shades was also featured in the movie but unfortunately not included on the official soundtrack album.

1. Dangerous - Monalisa Young
2. No T.V. No Phone - Price-Sulton
3. Love Is You - Redd Kross
4. The Girl In A Sweater - The Hard-Ons
5. This Could Be A Slow Song - Louis & Clark
6. Respect - Funky Lips
7. Take A Mile - Louis & Clark
8. Boo Hoo - Angie Jarree
9. Dangerous - Exploding White Mice
10. Pipeline - Agent Orange
11. (Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay - Chronic Disorder

The Princess Academy [1987]

"They'd rather break the rules than break their nails!""Once upon a time, there was an adorable little baby named Cindy Cathcart. She was the sweetest, rosiest-cheeked baby anyone had ever seen. Unfortunately, due to to circumstances beyond her control, Cindy was left on the doorstep of a terrible reform school for juvenile delinquents!" From here on in we learn that poor Cindy, due to her mother's carelessness, has been sentenced to spend her youth in a rough & tough institute for criminal kids - an institute that seems to teach less about reform than it does the art of robbing banks. Now, Cindy is about to be misplaced once again - in the Swiss Alps of all places, and at the snobbiest, most expensive academy in the world. The Von Pupsin School for Girls. "Little did she realise that this twist of fate would change her life, and hairstyle, forever". Cue music!

Among the stereotypical wealthy fashionistas; bimbos; rodeo girls; all too well-spoken British and not to forget the mousy virgin girl, orphan Cindy just doesn't fit. And it isn't long before her new room mate - Brit girl Pam - notices. As kinder a gesture as you can find at a school full of airheads, Pam lends Cindy some of her clothes and offers to show her the Von Pupsin ropes.

In the meantime, seeing that the American Social Register is lacking the Cathcart name, and that Cindy's background is not one of tremendous wealth, wrathful headmistress Stinkenschmidt is plotting a war against her new pupil. Little does Cindy know that the plan to have her name swiftly eliminated from the Von Pupsin admissions register will soon involve not only crooked teachers, but calculating students, too.

Next up, some harmless hijinks in the form of tampons and itching powder thanks to Cindy's new gang of friends - Pam, Texas cowgirl Lulu, and Isabelle, daughter of a beefy mafia owner. When Stinkenschmidt hears of their prank, she jumps at the chance of blaming enemy number one, Cindy. But the girls are all too preoccupied to care, what with the thought of their upcoming ice skating field trip in which they are allowed to meet up with pupils from the boy's academy. But if itching powder, snowball fights, and further practical jokes involving horse manure doesn't tip Stinkenschmidt over the edge, something will. When the girls get caught having snuck out of the academy late at night, Cindy receives the brunt of the punishment: immediate expulsion.

Refusing to leave, Cindy and her pals conjure up a plan of action, intent on sweet revenge - and in the process uncover a dirty secret that's sure to be the last of the sly Ms. Stinkenschmidt. Can they get rid of the evil headmistress and graduate?

VERDICT: ★★

The Princess Academy is just one in a very long line of budgetless and now almost totally obscure teen sex comedies to come out of the '80s. Very similar to Private School and Pretty Smart - though inferior to both - The Princess Academy has only one main difference. No nudity! No, honestly. You've got your fair share of sex jokes and innuendo, enough to earn the flick an R rating on release, but none of the usual ass and boobage. What you have got though, is bad foreign accents, bad hair, a bad animated opening sequence and a non-existent plot. But that doesn't mean it's not fun. Yes, it's crude, and pretty horrendous in hindsight, but it is marginally enjoyable and another flick that makes us smile when the good guys win in the end. One final plus point: corny music montage about fifteen minutes in. We all love a good montage now don't we?

Don't deny it.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

1. Gold Card Rap - Sid Caesar
2. Money's Everything - Julian Raymond
3. Gate 44 - David Wheatley

4. Beautiful Girls - Maurice and the Cliches
5. Skyline - Maurice and the Cliches
6. Hot & Heavy - Hurricane
7. Girls Are Out Tonight - Hurricane
8. Give Me A Reason - Chuck E. Weiss
9. Nocturnal Emissions - Chuck E. Weiss
10. Pomp and Centipede - Ten Lepers
11. First Time - Jula Bell
12. Gold Card - Ten Lepers

Girls Just Want to Have Fun [1985]

"That's all they really want!"

Teenager Janey (Sarah Jessica Parker) has a love for one thing and one thing only: dancing. With her sights set on becoming a star, her luck is in when her family relocate to Chicago - home to none other than the after school dance phenomenon DTV.

Within no time at all, Janey - all too familiar with moving from one school to another - meets the outrageous Dance TV fanatic Lynne (Helen Hunt), and together they plan to showcase their talents in the upcoming DTV auditions. This is it. Now or never. Janey's big break. Well, it would be if it wasn't for her uptight, military obsessed father who is dead against the idea.

Friday arrives. It's the day of the auditions. Lynne is buzzing with excitement, that is, until Janey coughs up the courage to admit she won't be auditioning. But - in a change of heart - her enormous passion for dancing shines through and, ignoring the words of her dad, hops onto the bus downtown.

They arrive, nearly being run down by the spoilt daddy's girl Natalie in the process. Lynne shows a bit of attitude and puts Natalie's nose right out of joint, only leading to disaster later on when - during Lynne's audition - she is shoved around by her dance partner and made to look a fool of in front of the judges, who immediately disqualify her. Lyn and Janey smell a rat and their suspicions are confirmed when they spot the conniving Natalie, who - having schemed up the entire catastrophic audition - is busy paying off Lynne's dance partner for his crafty endeavor. And so begins a continuous battle between the three dance hopefuls!

Having made it through the first round, Janey is paired up with the motorbike riding rebel, Jeff (Lee Montgomery) - who couldn't be more different from the happy-go-lucky Catholic schoolgirl. Clashing nonstop throughout their first rehearsal, things are looking pretty hopeless. But, unsurprisingly, it doesn't take long for the two opposites to attract.

Soon, news has circulated of a party - to be precise, the bratty Natalie's debutantes ball. What better way for Janey and Lynne spread a bit of revenge than by crashing the party! Printing out hundreds of copies of invitations, they invite some of the wackiest, punkiest, scariest looking kids in town, and watch from a distance as the sophisticated gathering is trashed from top to bottom!

Janey and Jeff have become the perfect couple by now, dancing their way to the live DTV final. Things don't come easy though, of course, when Jeff is threatened by Natalie's millionaire father: lose the competition or have your father lose his job. To make things worse, Janey is caught sneaking home from her and Jeff's dance practice late at night and is grounded by her furious father. But will they give in at the last hurdle, or will they make it to DTV? And more importantly - will they win?

VERDICT: ★★★ ½

Girls Just Want to Have Fun is one of the more recognisable New World Pictures flicks - maybe because of the famous faces; Sarah Jessica Parker, Helen Hunt and Shannen Doherty, or simply because it is an enjoyable '80s dance movie. Either way, New World managed to whip up a nice little time capsule of music, dancing and fashions, with a cliched, fluffy, but grin inducing plot. Shannen Doherty with her screechy, squeaky voice in the role of Jeff's little sister is particularly brilliant, as is Helen Hunt's outfits and feathered hair towards the end of the movie.

The words 'classic' and 'definitive' are often used when referring to GJWTHF, though countless other dance movies of the '80s are just as good. However, if you haven't seen it, pop it on one day and go crashing back to '85 as soon as the title rolls up on screen. Without a doubt, worthy of your time.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

The soundtrack was released along with the movie in 1985, on cassette and LP. CD copies were apparently pressed in Germany, too, and are now extremely sought after as a lot of the songs in the movie are difficult to track down. The Deborah Galli/Tami Holbrook/Meredith Marshall cover of 'Girls Just Want to Have Fun' is lacking in energy and doesn't hold a candle to Cyndi Lauper, but isn't bad. Lauper refused to make any appearance in the movie or on the soundtrack as she believed it'd scar her career - though her 1988 movie Vibes is no better than this flick.

1. (Come On) Shout! - Alex Brown
2. On the Loose - Chris Farren
3. I Can Fly - Rainey
4. Dancing In Heaven (Orbital Be-Bop) - Q-Feel
5. Girls Just Want to Have Fun - Deborah Galli feat. Tami Holbrook & Meredith Marshall
6. Dancing In the Street - Animotion
7. Too Cruel - Amy Hart
8. Technique - Rainey
9. Wake Up the Neighborhood - Holland

Yet another scarce but superbly '80s soundtrack that helps make the movie what it is. Should you find it in amongst someones record collection, steal it!

Modern Girls [1986]

"They're old enough to know better, and young enough not to care!"

Margo, CeCe and Kelly are best girlfriends. With boring nine to five jobs, they take full advantage of the LA nightlife at every opportunity. It begins on an average day; pretty Kelly (Virginia Madsen) is busy at work in the pet store - the guys outside more interested in her than the kittens in the window. Glamorous Margo (Daphne Zuniga), bored to death with her less-than-glamorous occupancy as a telephone salesgirl. And finally, the carefree CeCe (Cynthia Gibb), having a blast as a department-store worker, making-over customers in the beauty section - until her boss sacks her for transforming a middle-aged customer into an unsightly and brightly coloured punk!

When work hours are over and the sun goes down, the girls return to their apartment, and after a quick power-nap, are getting ready for a night on the town. Kelly, ditching Margo and CeCe, decides to take the car and whiz over to a club where her kinda-boyfriend-kinda-not - DJ, local legend, and asshole, Brad - is playing a set. There's soon a knock on the door from Kelly's so-called date, Clifford (Clayton Rohner). Margo glances out of the window, noticing Clifford's convertible and, realising her and CeCe have no car for the evening, invite him in. He asks after Kelly, with Margo replying; "didn't you know? We're meeting her later".

Clifford - CeCe soon nicknaming him Cliffy - doesn't seem too pleased about being roped into giving the girls a lift, but, believing he still has a date with Kelly, goes along with it. Turning up at a club, the girls and Cliffy approach Kelly who is across the room, all over her DJ kinda-boyfriend kinda-not. Cliffy is gutted, but Margo convinces him to cheer up and forget about it. Margo, Cliffy and CeCe dance & drink the night away, unaware that asshole Brad has done his usual stunt and rejected Kelly, leaving her alone and miserable. All of a sudden, the club begins to buzz and CeCe is ecstatic when the chart-topping rock star Bruno X (Clayton Rohner.. yup, he plays duel roles!) appears. Attempting to grab his attention but with no avail, she literally throws herself on him.. BOOM! Love at first sight. The club then gets raided and everyone scarpers, Cece and Margo following Cliffy back out to his car. After a heck of negotiation, the three go on a hunt for Bruno X, failing miserably on first attempt and almost getting shot off the road by terrorists!

Gasping for another drink, they wind up in a club full of goths - not the happiest of environments! Suddenly CeCe's brain clicks, finding a pack of matches with the name and number of a hotel on - the matches Bruno had given her earlier on! In another bid to track down CeCe's apparent true love, Cliffy poses as Bruno in order to call the hotel and listen to his messages. Succeeding, they rush downtown to the location of his video shoot, hoping to find the rock superstar.. but he is nowhere to be seen. Quickly switching their priorities, the gang of three start to worry about Kelly and, rather than wasting more of their time searching for Bruno, drive off to find her.

Arriving just in time to rescue Kelly from a sticky situation involving ecstasy and a pool table, they bundle into the car. Putting two and two together, they come up with and idea that CeCe won't let go of, in the hope that it'll lead her to Bruno X. Turning up at an exclusive club where they believe Bruno might be hanging out, they swindle their way in with Cliffy being passed off as a cool Bruno X lookalike. Again, their search seems to be getting them nowhere, and CeCe's patience is running thin. When all seems lost - by a stroke of luck - she runs into a guy who seems to have just the information she wants about the whereabouts of the love of her life. Just when she thinks the guy of her dreams is within her grasp, Kelly disappears, whisked away by a guy she'd met earlier that evening. Cliffy and the girls start to worry about her and another mad chase ensues, leading to all four being held up in the police station.

Tired, weary and out of luck, Cliffy, Margo, CeCe and Kelly have just about had enough for the night. But CeCe won't give in that easily and, knowing Bruno X might be closer than they think, they give it one last go at finding the MTV star.

VERDICT: ★★★ ½

Granted, Modern Girls doesn't have the greatest plot, and to some may feel a little pointless at the end of the hour and twenty minutes. But, you will honestly not find a more '80s movie anywhere, ever. You've got LA nightlife, you've got clubkids and their outrageous outfits, you've got a bunch of girls living in just about the most trendily decorated and furnished apartment of 1986, you've got one of the most well-assembled soundtracks of the decade, you've got essential '80s stars.. The list could go on and on and on. Every single aspect of the movie is something that, today, wouldn't be seen anywhere. And for that, Modern Girls deserves to be bought a drink.

If you can't appreciate this movie for what it is, for the fact that it carries you right back to the neon-lit decade of synth-pop and flame-coloured eyeshadow, then you really shouldn't bother with '80s movies at all. You gotta dust your tape machine off for this one too, still out of print and unlikely to be released on any shiny little disks anytime soon. But, once the credits roll and you press rewind, the whirring in your ears of those reels winding themselves backwards just adds to the once contemporary, now wickedly outdated (and all the better for it!) experience of Modern Girls.

You'd be silly not to check out the treasure trove of a site dedicated to this movie, moderngirlsmovie.com. How cool is that?!

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie clip]

SOUNDTRACK:

The Modern Girls soundtrack is a great mix of new-wave and synth-pop tunes, and usually you'll find more than one LP/cassette up on ebay for less than the price of a hamburger. A great soundtrack, standout tune being But Not Tonight by Depeche Mode - then again, each and every song fits perfectly with the accompanying scenes, for example Weak in the Presence of Beauty which plays during CeCe & Bruno's first kiss.

1. But Not Tonight - Depeche Mode
2. How Many Lovers - Anthony & the Camp
3. Weak in the Presence of Beauty - Floy Joy
4. Girl Pulled a Dog - Femal Body Inspectors
5. Girls Night Out - Toni Basil
6. Concentration Breakdown - George Black
7. Jealousy - Club Nouveau
8. No Promises - Icehouse
9. One Way Love - TKA
10. Some Candy Talking - The Jesus and Mary Chain

The soundtrack is excellent, but is unfortunately incomplete, with many songs featured in the movie now near-impossible to get your hands on. Modern Girls lovers are often on the lookout for tracks performed by the voice behind Bruno X, Scott Rogness, however they seem to have faded into total obscurity - much to the disappointment of Bruno X fangirls (including myself).

Welcome to 18 [1986]

"It took a little danger, a little romance, a big 'gamble', and a lot of luck to get them this far.."

Welcome to 18 begins with us meeting best girl-friends Lindsey (Courtney Thorne-Smith), Joey (Mariska Hargitay) and Robin (JoAnn Willette). School is over and the girls decide to have an adventurous summer together; they raise their glasses to 'freedom and fun' and are then off in their convertible to Lake Tahoe, where summer jobs await them.

The three end up at a ranch, which at first sight seems like the perfect summer vacation. But as soon as they are assigned their jobs, Lindsey, Joey and Robin all begin to wish they had stayed at home. After a long week of hard work and no play, the girls wait with anticipation for their wages. This turns out to be the last straw, however, and when they are each paid less than a satisfactory wage they pack up their suitcases and leave.

With nowhere to go and barely any money for a room elsewhere, the girls deliberate over what to do. Robin convinces Joey and Lindsey that she knows the perfect place - they take her word for it and drive out there. Soon they turn up at a flashy lakeside condo belonging to two guests Robin had met at the ranch, Talia and boyfriend Roscoe. The couple let them stay, and soon the girls and new best friend Talia are having a total blast.

It's not long before Roscoe has fixed the girls up with fake ID's in order for them to work at a local casino to earn some money. This allows them to move out of Talia and Roscoe's place and into a small cabin, where they are neighbour to outrageous transvestite Fuschia. Things seem to be going great until the girls are invited to a party at Roscoe's and it gets busted by cops. They are arrested on prostitution charges and thrown in a cell until Roscoe agrees to pay their bail money. Once released, they are given an ultimatum; pay up and get out of town or else.

Then one night, Talia turns up at their place bruised and bleeding and the girls realise that Roscoe is nowhere near as nice as they once thought. Lindsey then decides that she can win Roscoe his money back in a card game - thanks to learning some tricks in the casino - and the girls convince Talia to leave with them once they've paid up.

Will Lindsey win back his money? Will Talia leave with them? And more importantly, will they get revenge on hard-man Roscoe?

VERDICT: ★★★ ½

In many ways this movie is reminiscent of Modern Girls, the friendship between the three girls, the fashions - even made the same year. The scene where the girls get ready for the party is very similar to the 'getting ready' scene at the beginning of Modern Girls, too, and both have awesomely '80s soundtracks. One nicer aspect of Welcome to 18 is that it's not the usual lower budget '80s teen movie - no T&A! The whole thing is incredibly lighthearted despite the gangster subplot.

Both Modern Girls and Welcome to 18 serve as complete and utter time capsules, but don't take this one seriously - after all, when are summer vacations meant to be serious?

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [movie clip]

SOUNDTRACK:

Coming soon!

Times Square [1980]

"Times Square is the music of the streets"

Times Square begins with a completely riotous entrance by Robin Johnson. Carrying not much other than a guitar and amp, the ferocious Nicky Marotta casually walks the New York streets. A backdrop of sleazy clubs and even sleazier New Yorkers set the scene - the night lit up with glowing colours and the sound of Roxy Music.

We follow street smart runaway Nicky, as she causes commotion - and in true punk style is arrested for smashing car headlights. After experiencing Nicky's erratic and fearless behaviour, the cops have her committed to the local psychiatric hospital.

Meanwhile, sheltered and wealthy Pamela Pearl is convinced she isn't 'normal'. Writing letters to local radio DJ Johnny LaGuardia (Tim Curry), Pammy describes her unconventional life and way of thinking. Her high-flying father soon decides to have Pamela institutionalized for her own good, and it is here that riot girl Nicky and her meet.

Pamela is intrigued by her rebellious roommate Nicky, watching her as she swears at doctors and eats the petals of her bedside roses.

Soon, Nicky has had it with hospital life. With the Ramones blaring from her boombox, she urges Pammy to run away with her. Using an ambulance as a getaway car, the two crash and smash their way as far from the hospital as they can - finding shelter in a run down old building. This is where the girls declare themselves as 'Sleaze Sisters' - partners in crime - stealing, betting, performing in a local club and (attempting to!) mug a local for money.

The Sleaze Sisters create a trail of destruction, with Pamela's dad hot on their tail to get his daughter home, safe. DJ Johnny LaGuardia announces the girls missing, yet allows the pair to broadcast their rebellious anti-society opinions and music live on air.

By now a cult has formed around the Sleaze Sisters, with New York teenagers admiring their hard-boiled views on society. But this doesn't stop the girls from having ups and downs, and experiencing the harsh truths of life; testing their almost love-like friendship to the extreme.

The Sleaze Sisters manage to go out with a bang, the film ending with Nicky, her guitar, and a whole load of chaos in Times Square.

VERDICT: ★★★ ½

Times Square is brilliant in the way it shows teen rebellion, friendship and emotions. Yeah, it has quite a few "that would never happen!" moments, but the girls' friendship is realistic. The film originally intended to have more of a lesbian slant - you can still see this in a few of the scenes and quotes, a favourite of mine being Nicky's "everything you say is poetry" speech to Pammy.

It is a total diamond in the rough and a great punk movie. The story apparently came together after director Allan Moyle found a diary of a mentally-ill young woman in the back of an old couch.

In my opinion the film has a really raw feel. It certainly isn't perfect, but there are so many near-perfect elements, two being the soundtrack and Trini Alvarado and in particular Robin Johnson's performance. Personally, I LOVE this movie, and am so glad to finally own the dvd. Anchor Bay, we salute you.

IMAGES/VIDEOS: [trailer]

SOUNDTRACK:

The double LP soundtrack took a beating before being released, Allan Moyle arguing with the studio over certain picks that he felt weren't appropriate. In a certain sense, I agree that the odd disco track is quite misplaced, but on the other hand, it emphasises the period of the late seventies/early eighties. No wonder the Sleaze Sisters had such a following - teenagers having to contend with that same-old disco pap that had been dragging on for years. Then all of a sudden, here come Nicky Marotta and Pamela Pearl, afraid of nothing, opposed to authority.

1. Rock Hard - Suzi Quatro
2. Talk Of The Town - Pretenders
3. Same Old Scene - Roxy Music
4. Down In The Park - Gary Numan

5. Help Me - Marcy Levy & Robin Gibb
6. Your Daughter Is One - Robin Johnson & Trini Alvarado
7. Babylon's Burning - The Ruts
8. You Can't Hurry Love - D. L. Byron
9. Walk On The Wild Side - Lou Reed
10.The Night Was Not - Desmond Child & Rouge
11. Life During Wartime - The Talking Heads
12. Pretty Boys - Joe Jackson
13. Take This Town - XTC
14. I Wanna Be Sedated - The Ramones
15. Damn Dog - Robin Johnson
16. Innocent, Not Guilty - Garland Jeffries
17. Grinding Halt - The Cure
18. Pissing In The River - Patti Smith Group
19. Flowers In The City - David Johansen & Robin Johnson
20. Damn Dog (Reprise) - Robin Johnson & The Cleo Club

The soundtrack is one of a kind, brilliant tracks from Patti Smith, the Ramones, the Ruts, XTC, as well as songs performed for the movie - 'Damn Dog' and 'Your Daughter is One'. Although Robin Johnson isn't one of the greatest singers of all-time, her audaciousness and uncooked vocals make a perfect team, fitting the Sleaze Sister image like a glove. It is practically impossible to list the best tracks of the album as they are part of a fantastic, must-have soundtrack, that is very near to being perfect.

Where the Boys Are '84 [1984]

"When girls want a vacation filled with sun, fun and romance, they go ... Where the Boys Are"

And Where the Boys are, is of course Fort Lauderdale. Four college girl-friends decide to take a Spring vacation to sunny Florida, in the hope of getting a bit more excitement than their usual college lives. Jennie, the blonde and beautiful classical music lover, Carole, the one with a "steady" boyfriend and a secret wild side, Laurie, who drools over the thought of Conan the Barbarian and Sandra, a slightly prudish Texan brunette.

Their trip begins as they pick up hunky roadside rocker, Scott Nash, who too is coincidentally headed for the sun-drenched Fort Lauderdale. But when they arrive at a manic hotel full of crazy college kids and not-so-nice rooms, the girls are less than pleased.

Soon they are hitting the beach and local clubs, with Sandra managing to hook up her cousin, Camden Roxbury with Jennie, who admires his work as a classical pianist. Whilst on their date at a club, it turns out that the girls' hunky travelling crony Scott is working there. When he spies Jennie with the nerdy Camden Roxbury, he stresses out.

When Camden leaves Jennie after a measly few minutes chat, her and the girls party hard for the rest of the night. After downing one too many drinks, the apparently demure Sandra has to be dragged out to the car by Laurie, who saves her from embarrassingly stripping on a table in the middle of the club. The car is then smashed into the doorway of a hotel and both Sandra and Laurie are arrested, with Sandra slurring as many insults as she can come up with before being thrown in a cell for the night. Meanwhile, Jennie and Scott end up leaving the club together and things seem to be getting cosier between them until Jennie decides that things aren't right.

The next day comes and Carole and Jennie realise they need to bail the girls out of jail somehow. Carole then ends up entering a "hot bod" contest to attempt to win the cash prize. After coming second, enough cash is scraped together but only enough for Laurie to be released. Sandra is then left, miserable and alone in the cell, where she meets potential Mr-Right; a police officer, who decides to finally let her go.

Later on the girls end up at a somewhat formal gathering in the super-stylish home belonging to Camden Roxbury's mother. They mingle for a while, until the word gets out that a "party" is going on, and soon the chic mansion is being trashed by hundreds of boozed up teens. Jennie is busy practically kissing the ground that Camden walks on, as he plays her his masterpieces on piano. Scott interrupts, and Camden is soon left looking like a complete asshole. Jennie quickly makes her way out to the car to leave, with Scott following her and attempting a kiss. She's having none of it and heads on to the car, only to find that Carole is also keen to leave. Turns out that Chip, Carole's boyfriend had been following her every move; watching her strut her stuff in the "hot bod" contest. He winds up at the party, but Carole sees him with another girl.

Somewhere in between all this, Sandra discovers that the cop she's been dating actually has a wife and kid, and Laurie, after finding her Conan, learns that he's actually a male prostitute.

The film ends with all four of the girls getting their wishes, but in completely different ways than they'd imagined.

VERDICT: ★★★

Once you attempt to brush aside the fact that these "college co-eds" are actually thirty-something housewives (and look it!), you're on your way to having fun in the Ft. Lauderdale sun, '80s style.

Other than the amazingly corny ending, Where the Boys are '84 is an enjoyable girlie beach flick. If you remember vacationing in Florida during the '80s, it'll be a huge nostalgia trip. With it just scraping a 2.0 rating on imdb, and apparently being a huge box office flop at the time, Where the Boys are '84 definitely aint no masterpiece. But what do you expect? If you're looking for masterpieces, I have no idea why you're here.

Stop hating on Where the Boys are '84, and take a vacation.

IMAGES/VIDEOS:

Coming soon!

SOUNDTRACK:

1. Where The Boys Are - Lisa Hartman
2. Hot Nights - Jude Cole
3. Seven Day Heaven - Shandi
4. Mini-Skirted - Sparks
5. Be-Bop-A-Lula - The Rockats
6. Jennie - Peter Beckett
7. Woman's Wise - The Rockats
8. Girl's Night Out - Toronto
9. Slippin' & Sliddin - Seymour
10. All Fired Up - Rick Derringer